August 2009
7 posts
French Girls
“Hey Man!” I yelled from across the hallway. He turned and looked at me. “What are you doing tonight?” There was a social gathering I thought he might enjoy.
“Going to a party with some French girls.”
“Ohhh R L Y?”
“What?”
“Where at?”
“I don’t know, somewhere around Wrigleyville.”
“Ew.”
...
The Sex is Incredible
A woman’s talents in the bedroom can very closely be related to how crazy they are in their normal life. This may not apply to 100% of good lays, but what I’ve found is the crazier the girl reacts to what I meant when I said, “You seem like someone who wouldn’t like milk,” the more likely it will be that they will pleasantly tear my dick off. This is a very specific crazy that I’m trying to...
What do you say to them? It seems as if it’s the hardest part about meeting a girl. Walking up and not looking like an asshole. A girl sneezed several times. I waited, she seemed to be a multiple sneezer, but this is my chance, I can say something clever, interesting, and definitely sexy. I wait several seconds after the final sneeze. Have I waited too long, is she going to sneeze again?...
What We're Thinking
We’re not thinking about anything else. You sit two or three seats away from us on a train, the table behind us at a coffee shop, you’re talking on your cell phone outside the library, you’re in the aisle next to us at the grocery store. We’re not thinking about ourselves, we’re not thinking about the weather. We’re pretending not to see you. We’re pretending we don’t care. We’re occasionally...
The trouble was she never tried to be beautiful. She had so much potential but wore dirty jeans and a t-shirt everyday. Pulled back hair and dark rimmed glasses everywhere she went. She wasn’t ugly, far from it. You knew once you got her out of those dirty grubs, her naked and curvaceous body would be other-worldly, a goddess with unpainted toenails. Maybe that’s what gave her such...